The End Of An Era.. And I Seem To Be Doing Okay With It



Today is my last day of co-op. At the very least, my last day as a student. It's been my life for 
9 1/2 years. I don't think I can really put into words all that it has meant and will always mean to me. It was my second home and many people there became family. I made incredible friendships that, while they didn't always last, were so important to me. I'm grateful I had them. Today is a day of lasts but really it's just a culmination of lasts that's been happening for a long time. 

As the end of the semester has been approaching, and I decided not to return as a student, I found myself wondering, "What's it going to be like? How am I going to handle this?" I won't really know for sure until next semester starts and I'm not there, but I think I'm going to be okay. There are several reasons I think this but the overall theme is that I've changed and co-op has changed. Still, it's not easy moving on from something you spent half your life doing. 

I've never been good with change. I really, really don't like it. But something I've recently discovered is it's all in your perspective. The other day, I was thinking about all my co-op memories and my old friends and I was getting really sad. I was viewing it as all that I've lost. When I realized that, it sort of shook me. Why am I feeling sad and thinking of all those times as things I've lost when I should be looking at it as all I gained? I took fun classes where I learned a lot. I made wonderful relationships that I will always treasure. I gained so much from being a part of this co-op. Yes, those times are past, and the memories can be bittersweet maybe, but how dare I get sad and view it as loss? 

I am thankful for the 9 1/2 years I spent in my co-op. I am thankful for the friends and memories I made. I am thankful to the wonderful women who obeyed God's leading to start this co-op and I'm thankful God put it on their hearts. I will miss it, but I also have been missing it for years as people leave and things change. I guess I'm growing up a bit because I'm getting better at realizing change happens. There's nothing I can do to stop it. But I can do something about how I react to change and I can be thankful for what I had instead of lamenting what was. I think it's okay to be sad, as long as I'm still thankful. 

 

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